Category: #Productivity

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Are you innovative? I think you might be.

As I’m writing this story, as a country, and as a person who is living in the State of Massachusetts, we are almost four months deep into our Covid 19 life. I’m defining this period as “Covid Life”, as I have tried to embrace the positive aspects of the situation we are in. This is versus dwelling on how our lives were prior to this pandemic, or what some refer to as what our “normal” life used to be.

Naturally being focused on the positive aspects of a scenario is something we should be doing all of the time, but it’s not always easy to do this. Why? Because there are often numerous other distractions we have when we have so many options of what we can be doing outside of our homes. However, given the fact many of us have been sequestered in one place for many months, I’m hopeful that everyone reading this can think of one thing they have done that is something positive they wouldn’t have done without being in our collective Covid 19 life.

When I think about what is the one thing I have done that is unique or would be considered innovative to the time period now, it would be something you will probably laugh about. That’s OK, as it is actually funny when I think about it too. Given it’s summer in Massachusetts, and we do not have a body of water to experience relaxing in our backyard, I decided it would be wonderful to have some type of water to enjoy nearby. Perhaps to simply float in.

As I was considering my options for how to innovatively find a solution for me and my family to enjoy floating in some water in our backyard, the obvious solution of having a pool entered into my mind. However, lots of other people also had this same idea. So, finding an affordable pool, and one that you could assemble yourself became a more difficult challenge than it ordinarily would be. So, what did I do? This is where I had to be innovative with my thinking.

Since most of the pools that would cater to adult people were not available, I thought perhaps non-adult pool options might have to be considered. As I was driving to the store to consider such options, I saw my next-door neighbors’ kids pool. It actually looked like the perfect solution! When I arrived at the store and made my way to the aisle where I would find pool solutions, right in front of me was the exact same pool that my next-door neighbors had. Keep in mind they are ages five and seven.

Given the fact the pool option I was considering was intended for grown-up kids, this didn’t eliminate it as an option. As a matter of fact, it was the ideal solution given how I wanted to utilize it. As I noted earlier, what I wanted to enjoy from having a backyard water option was to be able to float in some water. The water didn’t need to be deep, or the pool expansive in size, it only needed to be able to accommodate one person lounging in it. More ideally, factor in also acquiring a blow-up float to achieve and create the feeling of floating in the ocean on a raft! Yes, that is something I secretly love to do, and I find it to be amazingly relaxing. Warmer water is ideal, but most of the water in the places I go locally doesn’t get above 70 degrees. Hence the need for a float.

Upon solving my challenge of finding a pool that could accommodate my interest in floating in it, I decided to invest slightly more money and bought two more pools and floats so that others in my family could also float in them simultaneously. If you are thinking this solution must have cost a lot of money, my total investment was under $100! Does this solution make me happy? You bet it does. As a matter of fact, it’s even better than I expected it to be. Why? Because when I close my eyes while I am on my pool float, I imagine myself being transported to being in many wonderful tropical places, and all without hurting my bank account.

So, as promised, here are some tips you can consider to inspire and turn on your innovative mind.

  1. Think of a challenge. Any one. Consider how you would normally solve it, and then think of one or two other ways to find a solution.
  2. Pick up something near you that is made by a human. If you were an engineer, designer or inventor, how would you redesign this item?
  3. Take a walk outside. Preferably a place that has some nature you can admire. Look around and notice the structure of any item (e.g., a tree). Could you imagine how it might have been made differently?
  4. Find a half dozen random items around you. How would you put them together to create a sculpture? Try this, and take as much time or use as many other items to have the items fit together to remain in place (e.g., tape, glue, string). Now, imagine if someone paid you for what you created?
  5. Find someone you are living with, or contact someone via video to walk through and try out any of the four suggestions above. Brainstorming with another person is a phenomenal way to crank up your innovative mind.

If you have ever been told, or think you are not creative or innovative, I challenge you to try the suggestions above. There is a descent probability that you will change your mind about whether you consider yourself to be even slightly innovative. Perhaps you are not at a genius level of being that way, but I guarantee you have more creative and innovation abilities than you give yourself credit.

Kathleen E. R. Murphy is the Founder, Chief Performance Strategist and CEO of Market Me Too.  She is a Gallup Certified Strengths Finder Coach, author of Wisdom Whisperer  and Evolve! With the Wisdom Whisperer (published in December 2019), and is a well-respected motivational and social influencer with a global following from her numerous speaking, print, radio and television media appearances. She also is the creator and Host of a TV Show and Podcast called Murf & E Unfiltered – Zero BS Biz Talk.

Essentially every team is dysfunctional in some way. Our expertise is in uniting, motivating and bridging dysfunctional teams (sports & business), and turning them into epic ones.

Market Me Too also works with individuals from students to C-level executives. The individuals, business and sports teams we work with are coached on how to leverage and apply their peak performance talents on a daily basis. Our coaching produces repeatable, measurable and amazing results personally and professionally. Need proof? Just talk to our clients, or read through our testimonials.

If you want better and different results, let’s talk. We know how to help you get them. Contact Kathleen at kathymurphy@me.com or (339) 987-0195.

“NEW!” Guide for Teams:

Every team is dysfunctional at some point.  Click on the link below to obtain a “free guide” with (5) Proven Strategies To Turn Your Dysfunctional Team Into An Epic One

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Are athletes primed for future leadership roles?

For context, even if you played a sport when you were below the age of ten, I guarantee you benefitted from this experience in numerous ways you haven’t considered. One of the benefits was to learn early on the rules of what it takes to be a good team member. My definition of a good team member is someone who understands how to get along well with others on the team, and the basic elements of respect, collaboration and compromise. Three very impactful life lessons to acquire experience in as a young person.

When you were acquiring these impactful life lessons, I guarantee you were unaware of the value of them at the time. Or, perhaps with additional team experience, how the values of respect, collaboration and compromise would contribute to your ability to take on a leadership role as an adult.

Listening well was also a skill you began to hone as a young sports team member. Whether you actually were in compliance with what you were being told is separate from how well you were able to develop this skill. Everyone has the ability to listen, but not everyone has developed the ability to listen and benefit from what they have heard, or know how to apply it to the benefit of others.

If you were to ask most sports coaches what percentage of their team listens well, the range would be over 50%. However, if you asked them how well and what percentage of the team applies what they are being instructed to do, and do it well, the number is generally under half of the team. Why? The first reason is because listening well isn’t easy to do. Most listeners are not proficient at having 100% focus on what is being said. Due to the fact the majority of listeners are semi-distracted, they may miss key aspects of what is being communicated. Hence, the reason why coaches have to repeat themselves often, or find multiple methods of how to communicate their information.

So, is being a strong listener a trait which most leaders possess? Perhaps, and if you considered famous Austrian born, American management consultant icon Peter Drucker’s quote of “The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn’t said”, it leans towards suggesting listening is much more difficult to master than one might give it credit. However, when someone masters this skill, it can take you from a place of listening for the sake of responding to what you are hearing, to being an active listener with the intent of wanting to understand what you are hearing. There is an enormous difference between these two listening skill types.

Consider the next time when you are listening to someone which category of listening skills you are applying. When you are conscious and able to distinguish your listening type, you have moved towards mastering one of the critical leadership skills. This ability can be learned early on during your sports team experience, and coaches can and should be constantly mindful of honing this skill too. The athletes who become great leaders, will often possess the distinction of being the type of listener who is listening to learn. They will also appreciate the information being shared with them, with the sole intent to help inform them on making better leadership decisions.

Listening well and learning how to do so can also support another skill many athletes will also develop from their experience of being on a team. What is it? How to embrace and come out stronger on the other side of adversity. Since sports teams are largely measured on their wins and loss ability, having the ability to know how to leverage adversity to become stronger and to push beyond limits is critical to their potential future success individually or collectively.

The third aspect which athletes and coaches can equally benefit from, is understanding how to contribute to developing their team culture. Or, what I’ll refer to as their camaraderie level. Measuring team camaraderie can be subjective, but I guarantee everyone will agree about whether when asked, their team has great chemistry, or camaraderie. In other words, do they like and at a base level have a strong level of acceptance and respect for one another? First as a person, and second as a team member or coach?

Knowing how to contribute to the development of a strong team camaraderie level will set apart amazing leaders from average ones. The same will apply to coaches, and we can all agree camaraderie is something that takes time to develop. It also requires continuous attention and care being applied to it. Ignoring or not supporting a strong team culture will eventually have it wither as a grape would do on a vine, if it isn’t cared for.

Since one of my favorite things is to have people stop to pause and think about concepts which will contribute to supporting them better, I am hopeful that focusing on the tremendous benefits our future or current leaders gained from being on a strong team, will contribute to making them reflect on how their early years on a team influenced them to be the person they are today. Happy “belated” Father’s Day to all of the people who play this role in someone’s life.

Kathleen E. R. Murphy is the Founder, Chief Performance Strategist and CEO of Market Me Too.  She is a Gallup Certified Strengths Finder Coach, author of Wisdom Whisperer  and Evolve! With the Wisdom Whisperer (published in December 2019), and is a well-respected motivational and social influencer with a global following from her numerous speaking, print, radio and television media appearances. She also is the creator and Host of a TV Show and Podcast called Murf & E Unfiltered – Zero BS Biz Talk.

Essentially every team is dysfunctional in some way. Our expertise is in uniting, motivating and bridging dysfunctional teams (sports & business), and turning them into epic ones.

Market Me Too also works with individuals from students to C-level executives. The individuals, business and sports teams we work with are coached on how to leverage and apply their peak performance talents on a daily basis. Our coaching produces repeatable, measurable and amazing results personally and professionally. Need proof? Just talk to our clients, or read through our testimonials.

If you want better and different results, let’s talk. We know how to help you get them. Contact Kathleen at kathymurphy@me.com or (339) 987-0195.

“NEW!” Guide for Teams:

Every team is dysfunctional at some point.  Click on the link below to obtain a “free guide” with (5) Proven Strategies To Turn Your Dysfunctional Team Into An Epic One

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 Interviews & (7) Tips – How are you perceived?

A friend of mine sent me one of the most satirical videos I have seen in a while about a millennial who was being interviewed by a non-millennial.  Of course, the mock interview was exaggerated, but I’m certain this interview might be closer to reality for some than they might think. This was the perfect example of showcasing someone who is at the oblivious level of being self-aware.

In the last two decades, I have literally interviewed hundreds of people. When I think about the ones which stand out in my mind as being some of the best interviews, they were with people who were highly self-aware. So, at this point you might be considering whether you would have me place you into this category? You might also be wondering what my definition of being self-aware is. I hope you are, as there is a wide spectrum for this description.

Not everyone who is self-aware has years of interviewing experience. In fact, some of the least seasoned interview candidates highly impressed me with how aware they were of how they were being perceived. Part of their awareness has to do with emotional intelligence, so much of it is purely innate, and some self-awareness comes from both experience and coaching. In other words, there are a number of ways someone can become more self-aware, especially during interviews.

Here are some ideas about how you can become more self-aware during your future interviews, or potentially during professional conversations you are having with others.

  • During your interviews, what percentage of time are you speaking versus listening? If you are speaking more than 75% of the time, you might not be giving the interviewer a chance to ask you more questions to learn more about you.
  • Do you feel like your personality changes when you go into “interview mode”? If you do not know what I am referring to, then chances are you do go into “interview mode”. When you do this, you can come across as more “robotic”, and are less aware of how you are coming across to the interviewer.
  • Are you so nervous during the interview that you simply want it to be over? What if you could actually enjoy the interview process? You can if you are more self-aware of how you are being perceived.
  • Have you ever practiced and recorded how you are acting during a mock interview? You will be amazed at potentially the things you might be doing which you are not aware of (e.g., blinking more than normal, moving around a great deal in your chair, not making enough eye contact with the interviewer, interrupting the interviewer, nervously twisting your hair or itching your scalp). I could go on forever with this list, so I will spare you some of the more “interesting” things I have seen non-self-aware people have done.
  • Let’s assume you have descent posture. If you don’t have good posture, and regardless of whether you are sitting or standing, you can help to increase your perception of self-awareness by monitoring and having good posture. By doing this one simple thing, you will come across as being more confident and attentive.
  • Having the right amount of courtesy distance from the interviewer is also something to consider. Generally, this is not an issue, but it is something to factor in as well. Since most interviews these days are done via Zoom or other on-line methods, here is a link to some additional tips I recommended when I was on ABC News recently talking about “How to nail a Zoom 
  • Think about some of the people you might have interviewed. Which ones impressed you, and which ones didn’t? Make a list of the pros and cons, and think about whether any of them apply to you.

Interviewing can actually be fun, and the more self-aware you are, the more fun you can have with the process. When you interview well, it obviously opens up opportunities for you to consider. If you are interested in having more opportunities to consider, make sure you are as self-aware about how you come across to others as you can be. Achieving and mastering self-awareness should be a goal all of us can strive to accomplish. Good luck with the process, and let me know if my ideas can or did help you, or if you have others to add to this list.

Kathleen E. R. Murphy is the Founder, Chief Performance Strategist and CEO of Market Me Too.  She is a Gallup Certified Strengths Finder Coach, author of Wisdom Whisperer  and Evolve! With the Wisdom Whisperer (published in December 2019), and is a well-respected motivational and social influencer with a global following from her numerous speaking, print, radio and television media appearances. She also is the creator and Host of a TV Show and Podcast called Murf & E Unfiltered – Zero BS Biz Talk.

Essentially every team is dysfunctional in some way. Our expertise is in uniting, motivating and bridging dysfunctional teams (sports & business), and turning them into epic ones.

Market Me Too also works with individuals from students to C-level executives. The individuals, business and sports teams we work with are coached on how to leverage and apply their peak performance talents on a daily basis. Our coaching produces repeatable, measurable and amazing results personally and professionally. Need proof? Just talk to our clients, or read through our testimonials.

If you want better and different results, let’s talk. We know how to help you get them. Contact Kathleen at kathymurphy@me.com or (339) 987-0195.

“NEW!” Guide for Teams:

Every team is dysfunctional at some point.  Click on the link below to obtain a “free guide” with (5) Proven Strategies To Turn Your Dysfunctional Team Into An Epic One

 

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Are you a people judger?

Let’s go to your “wayback machine” and place yourself in kindergarten. This was a time in your life when you were less encumbered from making judgements about others, and were more accepting of the people you interacted with. How refreshing, especially if you consider the positive side and potential of everyone you interact with being your friend.

If you think about when you began to become discerning about who you were interacting with, and why, there are likely a few key interactions in your life which shaped your decisions. Unfortunately, some of them negatively influenced your ability to have an open mind. This is especially apparent when it comes to being aware and open to seeing the benefit of interacting with everyone on a neutral basis.

Right, wrong or indifferent, we are all judged on a regular basis by others, and by our own accounts on a daily basis. How we handle these judgements, and whether we let them impact us or others around us, is what separates us from having better and more fulfilling life experiences. Why? Because when we are always judging other people, we typically are not taking in all of the information to fairly do so. More importantly, no one is entitled to be judging others, but people do this all the time.

When people are judging other people, they are in essence defining the social barriers or opportunities that will be available to them. The more people judge others, and in a negative capacity, the fewer chances they will have to positively benefit from the extraordinary talents, insights and experiences from that person.

Not being judgmental requires us to be many things. One of them is open-minded. It’s easy to say you are an open-minded individual, but in reality, it is much harder to be one. In fact, for starters, if you don’t like to ask others questions, and truly listen to what they have to say, chances are you are not an open-minded person. Why? Because with limited information about someone, it is far easier to be judgmental about them.

Consider one of your recent encounters with someone you randomly met. Perhaps you were introduced to another person in a neutral setting. In this situation, neither of you knew much about the other person. This is a great time to test your ability to be open-minded, and to see what level of judgement you are casting on the new person. Or, to be able to gauge what your level of neutrality you are offering towards the person you are meeting.

In work environments, chances are you will be slightly less judgmental of people. This is due to the fact they have been vetted in some way to be associated with your company. However, when you meet them, you will likely put them through your own method of judging them, with the intent of quickly determining your future interaction levels with them. Even if you are going to be colleagues and will be required to work closely together, your initial judgement of someone will impact how well you will work together.

What if this initial meeting of a new colleague played out differently? What if you were open-minded to learning more about them, and took the time to understand who they are, what talents they have, and how to best interact with them? Would this set both of you up to have a far better working experience? Of course, it would. However, most people don’t set themselves up to initially experience this type of interaction success. Why? Because they are accustomed to being marginally judgmental based on years of being unaware of their actions.

If you are with me on supporting the philosophy that being open-minded, or at least striving to become more so, is something you want to be, below are some questions and factors to consider. They are intended to help you to learn and perhaps achieve becoming less or non-judgmental at some point.

  • Have you ever discussed how you became closed minded when it comes to interacting with new or current people you have in your life?
  • What are the factors causing you to be judgmental?
  • How aware are you on a scale of 1-5 (5 being the highest) of being judgmental?
  • Has being judgmental actually benefitted you professionally?
  • Think of a time when being judgmental backfired?
  • Are you willing to consider being less judgmental?
  • When you are judging others, are you doing so out of insecurity?
  • Think about a time you were open-minded and the results of the interaction?
  • If there was a way to become less or completely non-judgmental, would you want to be this way?
  • Think of someone you admire. Is one of their qualities being non-judgmental?
  • Do you think you have the capacity to be non-judgmental?

When you are able to interact with people in a non-judgmental way, consider yourself as being fortunate. Ultimately this is something as humans we owe to both ourselves and to others to strive to achieve being more accepting of other people. We may not achieve this, or all have this as a goal. However, I firmly believe our world would certainly be a much better place to live in, if we were even slightly all more open-minded towards others.

Kathleen E. R. Murphy is the Founder, Chief Performance Strategist and CEO of Market Me Too.  She is a Gallup Certified Strengths Finder Coach, author of Wisdom Whisperer  and Evolve! With the Wisdom Whisperer (published in December 2019), and is a well-respected motivational and social influencer with a global following from her numerous speaking, print, radio and television media appearances. She also is the creator and Host of a TV Show and Podcast called Murf & E Unfiltered – Zero BS Biz Talk.

Essentially every team is dysfunctional in some way. Our expertise is in uniting, motivating and bridging dysfunctional teams (sports & business), and turning them into epic ones.

Market Me Too also works with individuals from students to C-level executives. The individuals, business and sports teams we work with are coached on how to leverage and apply their peak performance talents on a daily basis. Our coaching produces repeatable, measurable and amazing results personally and professionally. Need proof? Just talk to our clients, or read through our testimonials.

If you want better and different results, let’s talk. We know how to help you get them. Contact Kathleen at kathymurphy@me.com or (339) 987-0195.

“NEW!” Guide for Teams:

Every team is dysfunctional at some point.  Click on the link below to obtain a “free guide” with (5) Proven Strategies To Turn Your Dysfunctional Team Into An Epic One

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Would you be your own friend?

Consider the last time you gave yourself a pep talk. Did it actually help? How was the conversation? Was it actually useful, or did it lean towards being less constructive? Perhaps part of the conversation was focused on the negative aspects of your life? Would we allow a friend to talk to us the way we have these internal conversations? I hope not.

So, why do we allow what I refer to as the “negative friend” to infiltrate any of our conversations? In real life, we would probably not be friends with someone who talked to us this way, or at least our tolerance level wouldn’t permit us to spend much time with them.

I normally do not write about topics which have a negative tone. However, the reason I decided to write about this is to help influence and point out how people first need to recognize this is something they are doing. As you know, we can only fix things when we are aware there is a problem, and this is increasingly becoming a more common problem I am seeing that people are struggling with.

To address the challenge of helping people who are having negative internal conversations, I chose to write about how they can work towards reducing, and hopefully eliminating this behavior as their ultimate goal. Yes, I’m sure you know some people who seem to relish living in what I’ll call their constant “pity parties”, but it’s possible they are doing this without being aware of this tendency. Does this seem absurd? Potentially, but I guarantee you know at least one person who behaves this way.

How do people end up becoming the friend they would never pick? Numerous ways, including becoming accustomed to accepting this thinking as acceptable. It’s not, and it can be exhausting for both the person experiencing it, as well as others they have talked to about their thinking.

Like habits, if we are willing to first accept the challenge of breaking or starting a good habit, it will take time to do so. Potentially as long as six weeks, but it will be worth it.

Assuming you are up for the challenge of changing your internal negative self-talk, or helping someone who is, here are some ways to go about doing so.

  • Be honest with yourself about how often you beat yourself up mentally with your negative self-talk.
  • How long would you put up with an actual friend talking to you the way you talk to yourself?
  • When you catch yourself beginning to go down the negativity path, pause and think about why you are doing this?
  • Consider when you are caught up in your negative self-talking what you are actually accomplishing? Do you really think you deserve to be spoken that way?
  • Work on finding ways to improve your confidence. Literally in doing anything well, even as something as simple as taking care of your teeth better. We can all do this. After you have taken some extra time to care for your teeth, outwardly tell yourself how amazing it is that you are starting to take such great care of your dental hygiene.
  • Hearing ourselves talk positively out loud is equivalent to someone else giving you praise. Most humans will benefit from praise, even if it comes from ourselves.
  • Keep track and write down how often you are negatively interacting with yourself. You might be surprised in one hour how often this is happening. Remember, to change our behaviors, we have to be aware of them.
  • At the end of the day, review how many times you caught yourself being negative with your thoughts. Is there something going on in your life that is contributing to this happening so frequently?
  • Ask someone you trust whether they find themselves struggling with negative self-talk. You will be surprised how many people have this experience.
  • If after trying some of these suggestions for a couple of weeks and you are not experiencing a reduction in how often you are negatively talking to yourself, consider talking to a professional therapist or counselor to help you.

No one should have to feel like they are stuck with living with a personality or behaviors they wouldn’t tolerate from others treating them that way. Given all of the stress our global society is experiencing right now, the last thing we need to be dealing with is making our own lives more difficult to deal with. Not that you need permission, but you do have a choice to be happy, and I hope this is a choice you are able to and want to make. Stay healthy everyone, both physically and mentally.

Kathleen E. R. Murphy is the Founder, Chief Performance Strategist and CEO of Market Me Too.  She is a Gallup Certified Strengths Finder Coach, author of Wisdom Whisperer  and Evolve! With the Wisdom Whisperer (published in December 2019), and is a well-respected motivational and social influencer with a global following from her numerous speaking, print, radio and television media appearances. She also is the creator and Host of a TV Show and Podcast called Murf & E Unfiltered – Zero BS Biz Talk.

Essentially every team is dysfunctional in some way. Our expertise is in uniting, motivating and bridging dysfunctional teams (sports & business), and turning them into epic ones.

Market Me Too also works with individuals from students to C-level executives. The individuals, business and sports teams we work with are coached on how to leverage and apply their peak performance talents on a daily basis. Our coaching produces repeatable, measurable and amazing results personally and professionally. Need proof? Just talk to our clients, or read through our testimonials.

If you want better and different results, let’s talk. We know how to help you get them. Contact Kathleen at kathymurphy@me.com or (339) 987-0195.

“NEW!” Guide for Teams:

Every team is dysfunctional at some point.  Click on the link below to obtain a “free guide” with (5) Proven Strategies To Turn Your Dysfunctional Team Into An Epic One