Who Balances You?

Balance is one of those concepts which we all know we should have, or at least strive to maintain. The trick is to strike a balance with everything we have going on. Easier said than done. Add in the fact there are multiple dimensions to balance, and if you were to ask five people what their definition of this means, you would get five different responses.

For the sake of crafting a definition of what balance means to me, my description would include finding and maintaining a middle ground or neutrality in all aspects of our work and home lives. In other words, no drama or extremes would be factored into my definition.

Naturally we can all attempt to find and strike a balance on our own. We can also change the meaning of what balance in our lives mean over time, or situationally. The fact that having balance in our lives is a fluid concept can serve us well. When we have a steady dose of balance in our lives, we are generally more satisfied and happy.

Finding and maintaining a balanced life or work world can also be contagious. This is absolutely something you would want others to catch! Modeling balance in your life to others can contribute to helping others who can’t seem to grasp this concept. Finding people who have figured out how to achieve balance might be the hardest part. However, I assure you will not have to look hard for them.

So, how do you begin looking for people who are well balanced? Good question, but luckily it is easier to find them than you might think it would be. Here are some suggestions on how to go about finding them, and perhaps someone who can help to balance you.

  • People who have balance in their life are generally even tempered individuals, and not much rattles their personality.
  • They avoid drama.
  • They are not interested in being in the spotlight, and will often avoid situations which would call any attention to them.
  • Generally, people who have balance in their life or at work are willing to help others, and will often sacrifice their time to do so.
  • Material things do not matter to them.
  • Strong relationships with others are a part of their rock-solid foundation, and they will not compromise a relationship if they are a balanced person.
  • You can count on people who have balance. They will seldom disappoint you.
  • They will often put your needs ahead of theirs, and without any hesitation in doing so.
  • Most of the time they are highly accomplished individuals in a multitude of areas in their work and home life.
  • They give sound and actionable advice that always seems to come at the right time, and produces results you may not have been able to achieve or have thought of without it.

Having balance in your life is something we should all seek to achieve. People who do tend to be healthier, stronger relationships, are more resilient, have more opportunities to pursue, and a much more positive outlook on the world they live in. Isn’t it time you started to seek more balance in your life, or perhaps help someone who is struggling with not having any?

Kathleen E. R. Murphy is the Founder, Chief Performance Strategist and CEO of Market Me Too.  She is a Gallup Certified Strengths Finder Coachauthor of Wisdom Whispererand is a well-respected motivational and social influencer with a global following from her numerous speaking, print, radio and television media appearances. She also is the creator and Host of a TV Show and Podcast called Murf & E Unfiltered – Zero BS Biz Talk.

Essentially every team is dysfunctional in some way. Our expertise is in uniting, motivating and bridging dysfunctional teams (sports & business), and turning them into epic ones.

Market Me Too also works with individuals from students to C-level executives. The individuals, business and sports teams we work with are coached on how to leverage and apply their peak performance talents on a daily basis. Our coaching produces repeatable, measurable and amazing results personally and professionally. Need proof? Just talk to our clients, or read through our testimonials.

If you want better and different results, let’s talk. We know how to help you get them. Contact Kathleen at kathymurphy@me.com or (339) 987-0195.

“NEW!” Guide for Teams:

Every team is dysfunctional at some point.  Click on the link below to obtain a “free guide” with (5) Proven Strategies To Turn Your Dysfunctional Team Into An Epic One

 

Who Balances You?

It’s Wednesday, and I promised to share the “Overview” of the article I wrote called “Who Balances You?”. I have included it below.

Have a terrific rest of the day everyone, and remember to please….

“Like” and “Share” my articles.  Thank you!

Overview: 

There are lots of reasons we need to be balanced. One of the aspects of achieving balance is whether you have someone in your work or life “tribe” who balances you. Do you have a person or people who help you to maintain balance?

On Thursday, November 21, I will publish the full article. I think you will like it!

Kind regards,

Kathleen E.R. Murphy

Market Me Too

Additional information about what I’m up to:

Get in touch with me!

I love to hear from people! Please reach out to me at 339-987-0195 or kathymurphy@me.com to tell me who balances you!

Who Balances You?

It’s Wednesday, and I promised to share the “Overview” of the article I wrote called “Who Balances You?”. I have included it below.

Have a terrific rest of the day everyone, and remember to….

“Like” and “Share” my articles.  Thank you!

Overview: 

There are lots of reasons we need to be balanced. One of the aspects of achieving balance is whether you have someone in your work or life “tribe” who balances you. Do you have a person or people who help you to maintain balance?

On Thursday, November 21, I will publish the full article. I think you will like it!

 

-Kathleen E.R. Murphy

Market Me Too

www.marketmetoo.net

Additional information about what I’m up to:

Get in touch with me!

I love to hear from people! Please reach out to me at 339-987-0195 or kathymurphy@me.com to tell me who balances you!

Got negative self-talk? Get rid of it!

Too many people suffer from what I call the “negative cheerleader” on your shoulder syndrome. For some reason, they seem to listen to its negativity. Most of which is untrue, or is not based on reality. Where does this voice come from, and why does it have such a loud volume?

Perhaps a lack of confidence is what brings on the negative self-talk? Or, possibly fear? Regardless of what is causing the negative voice you don’t want to hear, it is important to begin with acknowledging this is something you are contending with.

The good news is that you are not alone. Many people I know tell me they are continuously combatting this, and are challenged with trying to overcome it. However, the reality is that you have probably been dealing with your negative cheerleader for many years. I’ll also acknowledge it’s not easy to overcome, but it is possible to do so. Are you willing to give it a try? I did, and it’s really worth doing so.

As with many things we want to change in our lives, one of the first things we need to do is to acknowledge we have a challenge in front of us. Next up? Be prepared to take on the challenge. This is a mindset switch, and you need to be mentally ready to proceed. If you are not, you are not setting yourself up for success. Starting slowly is the best approach, as we need to see some immediate results to give us the momentum to continue.

Let’s think of a situation many of us find ourselves in. Starting a new project. It could be a work, or home related project. Since we tend to be more critical of ourselves in work scenarios, this example will be work related. As we get ready to begin the project, visualize the completion of the project, and how it turned out really well. Think about how great you feel with knowing your project was a success. When we begin with visualizing a positive outcome, the chances of this occurring increase in our favor.

So, back to taming the negative cheerleader. When you first start to hear, or realize it’s beginning to chant, what I mentally do is to visualize a positive cheerleader on the other side of my shoulder. I then think of the positive cheerleader literally having a much louder voice than the negative one, and drowning out what they are saying. I also consciously tell and remind myself that the negativity I am hearing is not true, and the volume needs to be turned off.  Literally, turned off.

Finding the switch to turn off hearing the negatively in your mind is something I’m sure everyone wants to master and achieve. Here are some other suggestions you can try to help find your “off” button.

  • When the negative talk starts up, think about your attitude. Is your mood not where you want it to be? If possible, turn on your headphones and listen to your favorite song. This can help to course correct and put you back into a more positive mindset.
  • Depending on the time of the day, we might be more stressed or tired. These factors can contribute to turning on the negative talk. If possible, take a quick five-minute break, or restart your project when you are not stressed and tired. Caffeine can help too, but it can also contribute to making you feel more stressed. It’s a delicate balance, but an option to be considered as a temporary solution.
  • Your diet and what you eat plays a large role in how your body and mind are feeling. If you ate poorly today, perhaps this is the reason you are hearing more negative thoughts? A simple solution? Go have a piece of fruit, or a healthy snack to make you feel better. Oranges and the scent of them are scientifically known to make you feel happier.
  • Give yourself a pep talk. If you don’t have one, create a list of all of the things you are good at. Read through it, and then begin your project again. The negative cheerleader should have gone away, or have had its volume switch turned off.
  • Keep a running list of the times you avoided hearing the negativity. Are the instances you wrote down similar? Perhaps there is a pattern to the type of projects which give you more confidence, and have the positive cheerleader showing up more often?

Give some of the suggestions above a try, and finally start to bench the negative cheerleader from showing up in your mind. Finding your negative voice “off button” will make an incredible difference in the quality of your work, and in your life. I promise you it will. It has for me, and Positivity is my number one Gallup StrengthsFinder Strength!

Kathleen E. R. Murphy is the Founder, Chief Performance Strategist and CEO of Market Me Too.  She is a Gallup Certified Strengths Finder Coachauthor of Wisdom Whispererand is a well-respected motivational and social influencer with a global following from her numerous speaking, print, radio and television media appearances. She also is the creator and Host of a TV Show and Podcast called Murf & E Unfiltered – Zero BS Biz Talk.

Essentially every team is dysfunctional in some way. Our expertise is in uniting, motivating and bridging dysfunctional teams (sports & business), and turning them into epic ones.

Market Me Too also works with individuals from students to C-level executives. The individuals, business and sports teams we work with are coached on how to leverage and apply their peak performance talents on a daily basis. Our coaching produces repeatable, measurable and amazing results personally and professionally. Need proof? Just talk to our clients, or read through our testimonials.

If you want better and different results, let’s talk. We know how to help you get them. Contact Kathleen at kathymurphy@me.com or (339) 987-0195.

“NEW!” Guide for Teams:

Every team is dysfunctional at some point.  Click on the link below to obtain a “free guide” with (5) Proven Strategies To Turn Your Dysfunctional Team Into An Epic One

Are you aware of your unconscious biases?

Look around. What do you see? Depending on where you are is going to impact what you are seeing and reacting to. If you happen to be at work, you might be seeing your colleagues, and any number of different visual images of what is happening in your work environment. What you are seeing and experiencing could be the same thing every day, or perhaps the opposite of that a job that provides constant changing circumstances and scenery.

Essentially bias is another word, or a softer word for prejudice. If you know me, this is a word or type of thinking I don’t tolerate. As a matter of fact, I have called people out on this in my own family. When I do this, I ask them to explain why they think the way they do. Most of the time I vehemently disagree with their thinking, but I will give them the benefit of the doubt to consider re-thinking the way they think. I’m not saying my thinking is always right. However, when someone is overtly voicing or acting upon a bias I’m not going to be quiet about it.

Yes, I realize you cannot change people. They have to want to change themselves. However, I have found that 100% of the people who have a bias are not able to credibly explain why they think the way the do to justify their biased thinking. This is sad, and I understand they have been negatively influenced by their environment and the people they have been around or are associating with.

I view being biased as a human flaw. One which is supported often by closed minded thinkers. Yes, I’m giving closed minded people credit by suggesting they are actually thinking about why they are biased in the first place.

We can all agree that at the beginning and end of the day we are all the same. Humans. No one is better than someone else, and everyone has something good to offer others. Although, sometimes you have to look a bit harder to determine what it is, I guarantee it exists.

So, is it possible to remove biases in our day to day lives either professionally or personally? Absolutely. You just have to commit to doing so. One of the ways to do this is to commit to noticing biases you might have in every moment of your day. Think about why you might have this bias. Then think about whether you can reduce or ideally eliminate it.

Imagine how much better our world would be if we were all able to see one another as equals? I’m not sure if in my lifetime this will be achieved. However, I can do my small part which is to put a spotlight on this topic. When we think, and talk about concepts, it allows us to consider the reason why we act or say the things we do.

Here are some suggestions I have for you to begin reducing or attempting to eliminate biases in your life. I know this is a huge challenge, but I am compelled to make this a better world for all of us to live in. So, this is my version of heading us in this direction.

  • Commit to really getting to know new people. Find out what motivates them. Learn what makes them happy, or what makes them disappointed. Ask enough questions to determine whether they are “Pro” people, or closed minded and unwilling to give most people a chance to get to know them, or vice versa.
  • Try not to immediately judge both people and situations. Attempt to be open minded right from the start. This applies to both what you hear and see.
  • Listen to what others are saying. Really listen to them. Ask them questions to explain when you are hearing a bias of any kind. See whether by asking them additional questions you can potentially move them to at least a neutral place in their thinking, or verbalization on the topic you are discussing.
  • Model neutrality. Do this as you are working on becoming less or unbiased, and do not verbalize or act upon ones you have.
  • Do something kind instead of being biased towards a person, or put yourself into a situation you normally would not be involved with due to your own bias.
  • Lastly, an old piece of advice which is still applicable today, is to treat others how you would want to be treated. I have practiced this my entire life, and give credit to my parents for teaching me this. It really works, and has made an enormous difference in my life.

Although I have hope I will live to see the world become an unbiased place, I am realistic about this. As you know that change can only take place if we want it to, we can all do our part by at least acknowledging our own biases, and doing our best to understand why we have them, and ultimately to let them go. Being free from biases is an incredibly lofty aspiration. However, why wouldn’t we want to aspire to something that could literally and positively change the world we live in?

Kathleen E. R. Murphy is the Founder, Chief Performance Strategist and CEO of Market Me Too.  She is a Gallup Certified Strengths Finder Coachauthor of Wisdom Whispererand is a well-respected motivational and social influencer with a global following from her numerous speaking, print, radio and television media appearances.

Essentially every team is dysfunctional in some way. Our expertise is in uniting, motivating and bridging dysfunctional teams (sports & business), and turning them into epic ones.

Market Me Too also works with individuals from students to C-level executives. The individuals, business and sports teams we work with are coached on how to leverage and apply their peak performance talents on a daily basis. Our coaching produces repeatable, measurable and amazing results personally and professionally. Need proof? Just talk to our clients, or read through our testimonials.

If you want better and different results, let’s talk. We know how to help you get them. Contact Kathleen at kathymurphy@me.com or (339) 987-0195.

“NEW!” Guide for Teams:

Every team is dysfunctional at some point.  Click on the link below to obtain a “free guide” with (5) Proven Strategies To Turn Your Dysfunctional Team Into An Epic One