Sometimes I feel I have a superpower which allows me to sense other people’s energy levels. In many scenarios this can be in my favor, but when I am experiencing someone who is casting off negative energy, this becomes a challenge. A challenge for both myself, and for the person who may in fact not realize how others are picking up on the negativity they are emitting.
There are people who will describe themselves as being empathic and tell you this is the reason they can feel other people’s energy levels, or the dispositions they have at that moment in time. I’m not suggesting that I am one of these people, but I do believe I am able to pick up and am quite sensitive to other people’s inner emotions. Emotions which appear at times to be seeping out of them, and without them realizing this. Compare this to the analogy of cool or hot air leaking out from a building. You may not be able to see it, but it is occurring.
One thing which has always amazed me about people is their either casual unawareness or full dismissal of how their mood, attitude or presence is impacting others. Perhaps there are some people who are aware of their moods or negative attitudes, but they have not learned how to contain them. Or, to mask them in some manner which would be likely the appropriate response in most instances. Sure, there are times when it is acceptable to show your emotions, but the negative ones are not the ones you want to be showcasing on a regular basis.
If people were given a choice of whether they had the decision to be around negative people, most of them would tell you they would not select that option. However, the reality is that there are many professional and personal situations which we may not have the option to make this choice. Especially if you are on a business or sports team.
Teams can be a challenging entity to lead and manage the dynamics associated with it. This becomes more problematic when there are individuals on the team who are unaware of the impact of how their negative mood, attitude or presence is affecting others. Usually not in a positive or productive manner either. Do these people realize they are having the type of impact they are? Often, they do not, and there are a number of contributing reasons why they are behaving this way.
One of the reason’s is that they are selfish and think that the team revolves around them. Just because they are on a team, doesn’t mean someone has adopted what I will refer to as the ‘we’ versus their ‘me’ attitude they haven’t shed yet. This scenario and behavior isn’t only reserved for people in a particular decade of life. It is independent of this, as it is more of a mindset, and maturity level that some people reach sooner than others. Some actually struggle with ever getting to this place. The place of being unselfish.
Consider someone you know who is unselfish. Generally, they rarely complain, and they also tend to put the needs of others ahead of theirs. They make great teammates and are more enjoyable to be with because of their pleasant attitude and outlook which tends to be more positive than their negative counterparts.
Another contributor to someone who has emits negative energy is that they are immature from a personal development perspective. They also haven’t cracked the code yet on appreciating that others are in fact picking up on their negative disposition, and not benefitting from this in any way. In fact, what is worse, is that the negative energy they are emitting is taking positive energy away from the people they are around. Do you think this impacts either the individual or the entire team’s performance? Of course, it does, and not in the way any team would want it to do so.
Leaders and sports coaches are faced with the challenge of how to handle people on their team with negative moods, dispositions, or energy draining on a regular basis. As we know, negative energy can come and go. However, it is in the containment of it, or the awareness of how to be able to minimize its impact so that it doesn’t have a wider spread impact on a team. Doing this is critical for high performance leaders and their teams to master, as it will either positively contribute or reduce their level of achievements if it isn’t accomplished. Some leaders and sports coaches are better at this than others, as it can be quite frustrating to both confront and manage this mastery on a regular basis.
So, are there ways to address handling people who are negatively impacting your team? Yes, there are, and here are some suggestions to “test drive”.
- Conversations with negative people should always be handled in private and one-on-one so they do not feel as threatened or get more defensive and shut down on you.
- When opening your conversation with the individual, ask them how they think they are being perceived by others? You will likely be fascinated with their response.
- Ask the person to rate on a scale of 1-5, 5 being the highest what their level of their mood, disposition or self-awareness level is?
- Since they will likely ask you to give them some examples of how they are being perceived, I literally will tell them and use the analogy of showing them this information as if I was holding up a mirror to them as they are acting with their negative behavior.
- If the person is unaware of their behavior, ask them if they would like to be supported with altering this behavior? Often, they will tell you yes. However, you will need to have an understanding with them that as you are helping them, they need to focus on being able to receive the feedback as being constructive and not as a personal attack.
- When the person has asked for help to modify their behavior, they also need to commit to working on it until their behavior starts to change. Generally changing any type of behavior will take at least six weeks, so patience will be needed from both parties to achieve the desired end results.
- If a person isn’t willing to try to modify their negative energy impact, you may need to ultimately dismiss them from the team.
The impact that one person can have on a team can be enormously beneficial, although if their impact is negative and isn’t addressed by a leader, it will not serve you, the person in question, or the rest of the team well. Don’t delay in addressing this challenge, as it is well understood and realistic to say that it won’t just magically go away if you ignore it.
TAGS: #Leadership #Teams #Leader #Leadership #Leader #Sports #Sportsteam #Sportscoach #Awareness #Selfawareness #Negativity #Success #Motivation #Communication #Strategytips #Teamdynamics