Why are you ghosting people?

Having strong communication skills is a part of the foundation to both your personal and professional success. When you choose to eliminate or not practice aspects of your communication skills, this is equivalent to not taking care of yourself. When you make this decision, just like not taking good care of yourself, there are consequences. Some you might not immediately see, but over time, your Ghosting tendencies will negatively impact you.

For instance, if you repeatedly choose to hit the “ignore” button on people who are legitimately trying to reach you, I guarantee you this will adversely impact your reputation. Sure, there are plenty of people who may be trying to connect with you that you are not interested in having them do so. However, instead of ignoring them, simply let them know you are not interested in having a conversation with them at this time. Yes, it’s that simple, and yes, this is the right thing to do. No excuses.

Generally, when someone is trying to get in touch with you, they have a moderately good reason to do so. Perhaps their timing to connect with you isn’t the best, but they don’t know this. Especially if the reason for connecting with you might be legitimate. In my opinion, you do owe this person a conversation, or a quick email or text to acknowledge them. This is so easy to do, and if you are not doing this, I’m going to call you out on being both lazy, and rude.

Yes, this sentiment may appear to be harsh, but I can’t tell you how many times I have witnessed or heard stories from people about how they had an amazing offer or message to deliver to someone, and they could not get the person to acknowledge them. What a shame.

Ever had this happen to you? It shouldn’t, but the challenge is that people who Ghost others typically do not get called out on this bad social and communication behavior. Hence the reason I am discussing this concept, especially for those who are the Ghosting culprits.

So, should you simply give up on those who are Ghosting you? Some would say yes. However, I think you need to be persistent. Especially if you have something really positive to get through to them about!

Of course, it will be very frustrating to pursue trying to communicate with Ghosters, but it will be worth your patience to do so. I personally have an example of a Ghosting scenario I am contending with. Both my persistence skills and patience is absolutely being put to the test. However, I know when I get through to this Ghoster, they will be regretful of having acted this way.

The scenario involved with this Ghoster includes providing them with an opportunity to elevate both their personal and professional status in the local community. It also includes having others in their professional circle benefit from connecting with me too. Due to the reason so many people can be positively impacted by me getting through to this Ghoster is what drives me to pursue this opportunity. Why? Because I professionally know it is fortuitous for them, and others they have an impact on.

If you recognize yourself as being a Ghoster, I ask that you seriously consider why you are behaving this way. Or, are you not intentionally aware of the fact you are doing so? In the situation I am dealing with, I hope for their sake it is the latter. There is always time and space to increase a person’s awareness and communication skills. Dropping your Ghosting habit is certainly towards the top of the list of eliminating, and retiring this bad habit for good.

Kathleen E. R. Murphy is the Founder, Chief Performance Strategist and CEO of Market Me Too.  She is a Gallup Certified Strengths Finder Coachauthor of Wisdom Whispererand is a well-respected motivational and social influencer with a global following from her numerous speaking, print, radio and television media appearances.

Essentially every team is dysfunctional in some way. Our expertise is in uniting, motivating and bridging dysfunctional teams (sports & business), and turning them into epic ones.

Market Me Too also works with individuals from students to C-level executives. The individuals, business and sports teams we work with are coached on how to leverage and apply their peak performance talents on a daily basis. Our coaching produces repeatable, measurable and amazing results personally and professionally. Need proof? Just talk to our clients, or read through our testimonials.

If you want better and different results, let’s talk. We know how to help you get them. Contact Kathleen at kathymurphy@me.com or (339) 987-0195.

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